Climate War Trash

You may have heard the phrase “climate wars.” When you hear someone utter this phrase, please attempt to maintain social grace by not laughing in their face. Instead brace yourself for the forthcoming inane explanation about how some rival factions (80% of the time one of them is Islamic) are fighting over “natural resources.”
 
These geopolitical gurus will ignore the aggravating circumstances of all conflicts to impose the asinine idea that some Captain Planet archetype could solve our woes. They deny the rise of the Islamist guerrilla to the point that they would rather blame their elderly neighbor for over-watering his flowers believing that this will somehow preserve their future.
 
Do they really believe that world peace is to be achieved by making everybody drive hybrids and eat tofurkey at Thanksgiving and Christmas? What the hell is anybody in the rural United States, Europe and especially in an underdeveloped nation going to do with a 100 plus pound Hybrid battery when the vehicle kicks the bucket?
 
I say leave the old man watering his flowers or washing his car alone. Water falls out of the sky. And to the proponents of tofurkey I say tofu** you kindly.