Bernie “The Babysitter” Ward

You gotta love the Huffington Post. They hit Republicans with Vito “Vino” Fossella yesterday and they even celebrate his crying with a chaplain on capitol hill. They seemed to forget Bernie Ward admitted today that he was distributing child porn. Oops! That one slipped by the Huffington Post… 

I think an examination of liberal morality is in order;

Lets see here, the liberals savaged Larry Craig for playing George Michael, but Bernie’s child porn gets one quarter of the press.

Then the liberal crusader Eliot Spitzer, who raises our taxes, raises our taxes, so he can get a five thousand dollar an hour, coked up hooker, to have unprotected sex with. Even the liberal crusaders don’t use condoms and they still insist the kids they give condoms to will. Next time you talk to a liberal union teacher ask them; “When you bang your students, do you use a condom?” Even after Spitzer was caught, he tried to stay in office. After this final attempt at scumbaggery, he resigned and liberals call him “honorable” to this day.

The Lt Governor who came in under Eliot did not want to be outdone. He ran to the cameras and proclaimed, “I am, blind, coked up and got some strange on my wife. The b*tch cheated on me.” In a way, the doing coke while blind is interesting. How the hell does he cut lines and hold the straws? A true inspiration to the visually impaired.

After this debacle, we see a small resurgence of Rev. Jeremiah Wright. After a series of clips in which Wright showcases his patriotism, Obama says Wright was taken “out of context” and gave a lame speech in which he still defended Wright and then hid behind his own Grandmother. Liberals celebrated what a great speech this was. It was the most eloquent lie and excuse of all time, but that’s about it. Jeremiah Wright was not satisfied, so he showed up at the National Press Club and gave a stunning performance. He affirmed that all of the statements “taken out of context” were actually in context, like AIDS was invented by the government to commit genocide on people of color, the usual fire and brimstone sermon. Now Barack Obama decides they are in context as well and totally rejects his “spiritual mentor” of twenty years.

During this time, Hillary Clinton was talking about her combat experience, namely taking sniper fire in Bosnia. Now we all know Hillary only took sniper fire from the Daily Kos.

Vito Fosella, who we picked on here at The Rude News, was added to the Dumb Republican Hit List. The Huffington Post and other lesser liberal blogs loved lumping Vito up for being a hypocrite and pointing out his breakdown with the chaplain. It’s good to see that liberal compassion we keep hearing about. The problem here is, the same day, Bernie Ward, a liberal radio talk show host (Outside of NPR, who knew these things still existed?) admitted to choking his chicken at pictures of naked children engaged in sex acts. Now Bernie is no average liberal. He is an ordained Roman Catholic Priest.

I bet your bracing yourself for the jokes Bill Maher tells right? Well, I’ll kick his teeth in later.

You see, Bernie’s seminary training was at Berkeley, so you can forgive him for being overzealous in sharing his love. Berine is also one the guys who spearheaded the “get the child-molesting priests” crusade. This crusade later failed to show up for the “Great Public School Teacher Shag Fest” but that’s okay because the teachers are mostly liberals. But then, so are many priests…like Bernie.

This does not stop class acts like Bill Maher from lampooning the Catholics at every opportunity. Bill Maher even accused Sean Hannity of being a “secret child fu**er“, as he put it. I laughed my ass off reading that, because Bill Maher got cut short on a show for talking about children being masturbated by Michael Jackson. Hey Bill, we were just wondering if you are a bidder for that Neverland Ranch foreclosure sale?

The Catholic priest scandal has provided liberals with no end of fun. The fact that 0.2% of priests are predators, compared with 55% of their schoolteachers, is lost on them. They also forget that in the last thirty-two years, one out of two Democratic Presidents was a sexual predator.

So the next time a conservative falls short of the glory and is called a hypocrite, explain that to be a hypocrite, you have to try to be good first. Otherwise, you are just a liberal.

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